I have had the privilege of coaching young men in basketball for many years.
One particular game some years ago, we were getting beat soundly and our players were feeling pretty down. As I turned to the scoreboard and saw we were trailing 43 to 12 late in the first half, I called our players’ attention to it. I called their attention to the fact that the outside world was judging us based on those electric red numbers glaring … and yet the outside world had no idea the measure of a young man’s heart, the real measure of each of us — the real measure of our team’s success.
As we stood in the huddle together, we turned our attention toward each of our own measures of success, each step we were making individually and together to improve as basketball players (and as coaches) and as men. We talked about the outside world and the glare of the red, and set that aside to focus on the REAL wins, the TRUE measures of success.
COACHING TIP TUESDAY
Back on the court, the other team continued driving, scoring, pushing, harassing, showboating and taunting. And yet my boys never gave an inch and played with perseverance, tenacity and integrity until the final whistle.
Even though the neon red numbers had grown further and further apart, by the end of the game they no longer glared down on our team. Those numbers were no longer the key metric to be measured against; they were no longer all encompassing.*
* Excerpted from The Big Kid and Basketball
Pragmatically, the judgment of each of us by the ‘world‘, e.g., by our bosses, by our partners, by our customers, by our funders, by our spouses, and many others is important … important to our livelihood, our security, and for many other reasons.
And yet, when we each look in the mirror, the MOST important judgment of each us is how we feel about ourselves. The improvements we are making. The impact we are having. Our transformation and evolution. Our personal growth. The good (and the opportunities) we see in ourselves.
So yes, be aware of who is judging you and for what reason, manage to it, but at the end of the day …
… LOVE, CHERISH, and HONOR you for you. For who you are right now … as you continue to learn and grow and do so lovingly and with much care for self …
And in doing so, you will be wholer and healthier and better positioned to lead and serve for the betterment of self and others.